A New Life
by msichristine
Summary: In her 347 years alone, she has tried to find the purpose of her existence. Seeking herself. Unable to fit in. Of course vampires rarely fit in, but she doesn't even fit in amongst her kind. Bella was unwillingly made a vampire, after witnessing her fiance bleeding to death in the streets of London. Now, 2013, she is finding herself in Forks, Washington, about to start a new life.


**Disclaimer: Twilight is Stephenie Meyer's. I'd just like to play with her characters a bit. Plot is all mine ©msichristine2013.**

**Author's Note at the bottom. **

**ONE**  
_Isabella Marie Swan - Early Spring 2013_

I was once again on the road, on the run. Searching for a new life. I had stayed in my past location far too long and the expiration of my ID as Isabella, or Bella, Thorne was due soon. You can't pretend you are aging without ever changing appearance, so I had to leave that life behind.

My life as Isabella Thorne was now history once again. It was kind of funny actually, how I have been asked countless times during the years I've used the surname, if my mother was a fan of Jane Austen's work and thus had to call me Isabella, as my last name was Thorne.

Of course this wasn't at all true.

Firstly, my name was Isabella long before Jane Austen ever existed. Secondly, my surname isn't really Thorne, it's really Swan. Isabella Marie Swan. Thirdly, say Miss Austen had read a few of my books and we met briefly while she had tried to elope, and well, I dare hope she somehow remember our nice little chat. She was a strong headed young woman, she was. She had such a short span of life too.

I sigh, thinking of all the people living their lives. Begin born, living and dying. Always developing some kind of goal, always searching for happiness, always eventually getting there. They don't really realize how great life is, how precious it is. They'll never know, not while living at least. Their lives a filled with purpose, achievements, dreams, and they will somehow reach some of them. Everyone will get some part of it. To participate. Except me.

I'm stuck. Frozen in time, always reaching, willing myself to get to live and never succeeding in anything or quite fitting in anywhere. I couldn't ever be normal, not as human or vampire. My short human life was filled with failures upon failures, at least that's what I was told. I always did something at fault. In my long vampire existence, I've never been normal either. Not as a normal vampire would be. I've seen the pure cruel creatures others of my kind are, thriving in this eternal life and filled with bloodlust to drink. To kill. I could never betray my soul to kill, could never betray my God. I could never betray my long lost fiancée.

The mere thought of taking a life, a soul from this planet disgusted me then. It disgust me now, and it always will be this way.

So of course, I always denied what makes me vampire in the first place. There isn't anything less normal for a vampire to do. As I never wanted to be one, never wanted eternal life, I found myself starting to deny my predator and refusing to kill others. Though I tried, oh I tried so hard, to kill myself.

I was never successful in my attempts as to kill myself. Even after I noticed I could living and feeding without murdering human beings, I still tried. As always I failed, thus I am still here, not murdering humans and existing in an empty life without purpose for myself. Though I try to find my purpose every day, it is why I try to save people, attempt to find cures for incurable diseases and heal the ones with too many scars to count and the ones everybody has given up on.

Yes, I am a doctor, shrink, scientist and author amongst many others. When you have all the time in the world, all waking hours, it's quite easy going through educational degrees. I couldn't just do nothing while the people of the world was suffering. So here I am, moving from cities to cities all over the world to fight for the humans, for their lives. For the life I never had. For the live I had taken.

Don't get me wrong I never gave into my thirst, I've never drunk as much as a drop of human blood. In fact, the moment I smelled the overpowering odor of delicious blood the night I woke to this dark demon life, and I realized what I was longing for, my breath caught and somehow I managed to run away from it. I remember running for a long while, though it didn't feel long at all. My muscles never grew tired, so I kept running until I thought was far enough away and found the cave. The cave I spent the next decade frozen in self protective position in the darkest spot against the inner cave wall, until a poor deer found its way inside somehow. Scared for my life. Scared of myself, of what I'd become.

I sigh again. _I am not the only one scared of me. _

Though through my vampire years I've become better at making people at ease, they are still covering and uncoiling from me. Now I just long for contact with anyone, I have not had a comforting touch in almost five centuries.

Everywhere I turn people are scared of me. Terrified of me even, some nearly have heart attacks or strokes. It's kind of tiresome, too, as you can imagine. You'd think people dropping dead around you would be terrifying, if you're not an assassin or a serial killer. Both of which I am not.

_Stop with the negative thoughts already. I need to focus, to start thinking of where to go, who to be and what to do. _

I slow down my pace, settling into a stroll through the forest floor. I reach out with my senses and realize I am nearly back to human civilisation, I can hear and smell the presence of a town nearby. Not a big one, a small one. Surely it's one of those cosy one's where I in my last life, would have loved to settled down with my fiancée and bring up our children...

_Stop that thought_, I needn't think of what can't be. Not now, not ever.

It does no good to dwell on your past. Haven't I said so to my patients so many times, to get them to accept their past and move on. To get them to realize they can't change what's been, it done and decided. They can only look to the future, see what you can change to do better. Be better. Yet I can't seem to do so on my own. What a hypocrite.

_Ok, enough. Focus on the now_. I try to gather my emotions and then start to figure out what to make up the new story of my life instead. Ok, Bella. Think.

Orphaned sixteen-year-old girl, which is half-true. Emancipated, but had rich parents which explains my good fortune. Only problem, I've been through Ph.D's in several areas, such as literature, music and medicine to mention a few. Plus high school have been done about four thousand times already. It would mean I would only be able to stay for two-three years., before I'd supposedly go away for college. Also, this was a small town, where everyone knew everyone. Everybody would know of me, plus high school students are not shy to ask questions I'm sure would come up about my past. Which definitely wouldn't be good.

I could, of course be the new doctor at the community hospital, surgery or trauma which is always bound to be exciting and where I always get to do my best. Save lives. Heal people, it's the best feeling in the world. This is a small town though, albeit it would be a small hospital. Therefore there might also be a lot of people would be wondering of my young age. I mean, physically I am almost seventeen, so I can pass for someone as young as the age of sixteen to twenty-five at most. A twenty five year old and a fully educated doctor, that would mean I'd have taken pre-med when I was about twelve years old. Plus if I was that much of a prodigy genius, why on earth would I be working at a small town hospital and not at Hopkins or some other big city hospital. They wouldn't have let me get away. Here, in this small city, it would raise a lot of questions, which I don't want. No need to raise unnecessary attention and more suspicious thoughts.

_No, that wouldn't work here._

I could go for being twenty-or-something year old author trying to get her first novel published. In the meanwhile, just as deguise for income I could open a little cafe, or a business of whatever sort this little town seemed to be needing. I'm sure there is someone I'd manage to hire, who would be able to take over when I moved and the business was stable. Of course it would always be stable with my income, they wouldn't know that though. I might be able to use my psychology degree and get my intake of human contact, or any contact, by interacting with my customers. It might do some good too, as talking to customers might inspire my book and new characters. I needed inspiration, which lately has come to a block.

_This might just work_, I think as I shift my gaze upward to the sky. I can only see green, as the tree has branches waved so tightly together the green of the leaves completely obscure the view of the sky. I can hear the drops of rain drumming over the treetops though, except for the occasional drop to the ground the forest seems peaceful though full of life. Perfect hunting conditions, no human would dare go into this dark end of the forest, not with this complete lack of light from the sky.

As I start take in my surroundings, it seems I am North in the U.S. or South in Canada. It's not too cold weather to be freezing and by the look of this forest it seems there is a lot of downpour and little sun. Maybe little enough to go into hiding too much. I can faintly hear the crashing of the ocean in the distance, waves rushing to the shore bringing with it a distinct smell of salt in the winds. I must be near the coast, West of the continent I would think. Yes, that must be it.

_Yes, I can stay here. _

I have to find a name for myself, something I haven't used before. I ponder on my past names for a while, trying to search the people I've met for a name that would fit my birthname. I can't use Isabella, I actually never liked it. Especially the last years of my human life, when it was only my Father and I.

No, Bella is far better. It's what my fiancée and dearest friend used to call me. The last person who really cared and loved me. I would use Bella, there was only good memories I could recall with the use of the nickname. Ever since we were little, until the day he was dying beneath my hands in the chaos of my last night as a human. He was dead, and I was too. Dead, though living an illusion of life. Morte.. I could use Morte, italian and it goes with my name. Bella Morte, such as in beautiful death, though death rarely is beautiful.

I can stay here as Bella Morte, a girl of many sorrows. I lost my parents, or husband in Iraq. Maybe I can nineteen be turning twenty, stay here for five-six years. Get a business started as I try to write a book, maybe even several? If I get the inspiration, or I could shift over to medical journals again.

_Ok, I am Bella Morte. Nineteen going on twenty. My family is lost, my husband of two years was a marine in Iraq. I had to get away from my sorrows and ended up here, to write down my story maybe? Make new and better memories? So what business would I open?_

Well, I could open a Coffee shop? Nah, horrible smell. Café? Maybe, but I can't really make food and I wouldn't know what is good, I'd have to hire a chef as well as waitresses. The same goes for a restaurant or a diner. An inn maybe?

It might work, but I'd need to hire several people for that one too.

I could open a shoe or clothing store? But I have no sense of fashion in this era, besides it's a small town how many customers for clothes would I get. They probably travel to the next city or have a few already, no nothing that could become competitive business, too much attention.

Maybe I should find myself a home here first, then search the town for what they may need or already have. Some tips from the locals, listening to their chatter for a while. Find a suitable apartment or house, then a location for said business.

Yes, I should go in search for shelter for the night. The rain seems to have heard me, urging me with thunder and heavy raindrops soaking me wet. Not that it really bothers me, as it would anyone human, but it would be convenient to start this new chapter sooner rather than later.

I tend to bask in loneliness if I stay too isolated for too long and with that I straightened my duffle bag over my shoulder. Then started the run in the direction of the town, through the trees to my new beginning.

Soon I find the road and start walking along it at a human pace. Rain is still pouring down and thunder echoing through the trees, as I catch the sign welcoming me to Forks, the home of 3000 residents. Welcoming me to the new life I am about to start, and somehow I know this time it's gonna be different. I smile to myself a little, liking the thought of things being different.

I zip the hoodie all the way up and throw the hood over my hair, covering myself as any human would do in this weather. Bracing myself for what is yet to come. Here we go again, I thought as I walked past the sign.

Welcome to your new life, Bella.

**A/N:**

**Well, what do you think? This is my first published fanfic story, so please don't kill me. Any tips? Shall I continue?**


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